Happy Fathers day? (I guess)

Well this day never really mean much to me, I am sure it did when I was really young but growing up I never liked my father. He was a very abusive man and thats something its hard for a child to let go of. He never did anything right in my eyes because of what he put me and my mother through. After my mom passed in 2002 I did my best to forgive him for this wrong and understand I couldnt change what happened but I can learn to move on from it. My mother always wanted him and I to have a relationship but I was hell bent on not doing it. After about a year or so after my mom passed I made contact every now and then but didnt become too close to him. Once I was preg with the twins is when I spoke to God and God gave me the strength to let things go and him and I were there for eachother. There were times when he would piss me off and we would go back and forth I would seperate myself from him because he still has ways that I just don't agree with but all in all I love my father. Recently my father has been going off on the deep end with me and I am tired of forgiving and letting go but I havent spoken to him in about a month so last night I called him to say Happy fathers day. i explained to my father I deeply forgive him for his wrong and I understand that in his eyes he did the best he could with what he had at that time and he didnt understand how life changing his actions would become. After I did all that my father goes on to tell me how he doesnt agree with my lifestyle (me being a lesbian) and how no matter what I am going to do what I am going to do and I will pay for that at some point and learn and now he just loves the twins more than me, he also said he called the kids father and wished him a happy fathers day. Now this tore me up so bad because not only did he not call me for mothers day my childrens father is also abusive yet he called him. i am disgusted with my father like I am tired of crying over him and how he treats me. People keep telling me to forgive him but I cant allow him to keep hurting me like its ok..I am 31 and at this point I should be able to walk away from him. I am going to talk to God and my mother and let her know in my heart I have tried and I continue to try but at this point I have to give up....Ok..thats all