Today will be a wonderful day

I have a few things going on right now that are on my mind in some way shape or form. I have chosen to distant myself from a lot of things and people these days because if they don't promote anything positive in my life then there is no need for them to harbor any type of space in my life. I am going through some changes as far as going back to CT and starting the new job Monday. Its a great thing and I am prepared for things to get harder before they get easier but I know I am truly on the right path. I have been praying a lot, praying for change and positive things to come to me and my children and that has been happening. This year has been hard just like the past two years but its all coming back together for me. Omg I am turning 32 on Wednesday and I remember when I was turning 30 I was truly going through it like feeling so old and not wanting to age, but now its ok because with age come maturity and knowledge of what shouldnt be done in life. I can say I still do somethings that arent on the great path but once I realize whats being done i am able to stop. I am thankful for all I have and all I don't because whatever I don't have I will have if I work hard. School starts in a week and boy oh boy thats just what I need, I will be done in November and at that point I may make another career change, I hope it will be within the same company but if not it will be something good.
Now I want to take this time to talk about a friend of mine. Its a friend that plays a big, but silent part of my life. She has been there in times of need and times of wants, she has been there for me since I was pregnant with my twins and she has never left, No matter how many times I wont answer my phone or respond to a text or not show up when I am supposed to hang with her. Regardless of all that she remains a part of me. I am wondering if she stays because of her love for me or because she is just like me...whatever her reason is she still is here. I have to say I need her a lot, I know she doesnt need me as much as I need her but she still provides for me. I often wonder why are paths continue to cross I mean she is in and out of relationships and I am too yet no matter how much our mates may not like us dealing we continue to keep it close. Its not even a sexual thing its something much more, something deeper, something I can't seem to get away from. She is what I can consider an amazing friend, more of a friend then anyone else I know and its weird because I never expected that from her. Friends remain by your side even when they dont agree with what you are doing or who you are doing it with because they have faith in you to know you well enough to know its something that will soon pass once you are in a better place mentally. She is someone I can consider a best friend its kinda weird tho considering our past. Now I do get mad at her don't get me wrong our relatiionship isnt perfect she can piss me the fuck off like right now, I havent sent her several emails and imz asking her a question and she has responded then all of a sudden this morning I get a text saying "Looking for me?" she be on that bullshit sometimes but thats my heart right there....yeah...she got me. Now all yall bias readers don't get me wrong it is what it is right now, her and I have an understanding of eachother and where we don't want to go for many reasons but all in all I have to honestly say...I love her..*shrug* I have learned the hard way never deny your love for someone. I am learning more and more about love this year, I am learning what to do and what not to do, I am learning that if you truly love someone you keep them close you don't push them away when they hurt you, you try to build an understanding for them and why they do what they do and you help them no matter how hard it may be, not matter how they may disappoint you, just help them and you will see your effort come back 10 times. Ok well she just sent me an IM...imma go check my email then start getting ready for tomorrow. See yall lata